by Stefany J. Jones on Tuesday, July 14, 2009, at 6:49 pm

They marry you because they don’t want YOU to be with anyone else. This is a statement from my girlfriend’s mother, who is well into her sixties, and boy, does she have it all together.

She’s been married well over forty years, and I’m telling you I could probably write a best seller on her insight into marriage and relationships. I’m not sure I agree with all of her principles, but some things definitely make sense.

Ladies, you must know that men love the chase. That conquest and conquering are VERY IMPORTANT. Even after you are married, it is crucial. I am learning that more and more these days. There are givers and takers in relationships. I believe that when there is a severely unbalanced partnership, that is the formula for problematic relationships. There must be a give and take and a willingness for both on the part of BOTH parties.

In my idealistic view of life, love, and togetherness, I cannot help but to think, feel and believe that when there is total honesty, truth, and mutual respect between partners, a fair and equal and well placed loving relationship is possible.

Maybe things don’t exist the way we want them to because we don’t believe that they can, and we don’t strive for it to be. Maybe it is genuinely our thinking that rules overall, and since we go with the flow of the status quo (heh that rhymes), that is precisely what we get.

Well, let me just say this… if my husband only married me because he didn’t want anyone else to have me, then he succeeded. I believe in marriage and vows. I think that any wrong done to me will be answered for, as any wrong that I do. I would hope that when marriage is at stake, lives are at stake, and hearts are at stake, that everyone is entering into the realm of together for the right reasons all the way around.